


useless one shots of mine

by currentlycrying



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Basically married, Crack fics, Cuties, Fluff, HS AU, Highschool AU, Kids, M/M, cutest cute, feels recovery, give me prompts, im crying, this is so stupid
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-07
Updated: 2015-01-07
Packaged: 2018-03-04 11:46:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3066713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/currentlycrying/pseuds/currentlycrying
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>idk man give me prompts they'll basically be crack but pls dont hate me</p>
            </blockquote>





	useless one shots of mine

**Author's Note:**

  * For [starlightoffandoms (destinyofdreams)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/destinyofdreams/gifts).



> Hello friends this is a one shot for my bby ilyll  
> So like I like highschool aus bc highschool is dumb  
> This is so cheesy im crying love me senpai  
> This is also kinda crack and im not sorry I didn’t rlly even proof read it but this could be a series if u guys read this crap and give me prompts

“Dean Winchester, you are paired with Castiel Novak,” the teacher announced as to hte whole class turned around to where Dean was about to throw another ball of paper at Castiel and Castiel had Dean’s lunch bag on his desk with a smug expression. “Excuse me, what,” Dean said dropping the ball of paper and looking up at the teacher giving them the death glare. “I said, you two are now partners for the upcoming project we have been discussing,” she said giving him a how-fricking-stupid-are-you face. “you’re going to parent a baby,” someone said from the back as Charlie leaned over and whispered in Dean’s ear, “hella.”  
Within forty minutes, they had a baby alive (A BABY SO REAL!!!!!), a diaper bag, a carrying basket thing, and pure humiliation. “So, Cas, I guess you should’ve gotten out of my ass,” Dean said looking down at the battery powered baby. “also, we are naming this baby ACDC,” Dean said as he walked it to his car with Castiel trailing behind holding both book bags and diaper bag.  
“no, dean.”  
“John.”  
“no.”  
“dean junior”  
“no”  
“proof that castiel and I did the do.”  
“DEAN.”  
“Batman. ”  
“No, these are all lame names. I seem to be the mother and we are naming this child Jesus because it was just conceived one day and Gabriel probably had something to do with this.” Castiel said as Dean buckled the baby up in the front seat. “I need a ride home too,” Castiel said still standing outside the car. “There’s plenty of room in the back and trunk, honey,” casstiel sighed loudly as his blue blues clues eyes echoed his angry feeling toward baby daddy. “bean pease not infront of the baby!!! !!!11!!”  
With that, Castiel climbed into the back seat and Dean took them to Denny’s. “Dea n we cant feed out bby this crap! It needs love .” “yeah, and you need your constipation medicine so shut up and say its jesussus’ birthday so we can get a grand SLAM YEAAAAHHH!” Dean winIECHESTER SCREAMED AS HE TOOK THE BABY JESUS CHRIPS INTO THE RESTRUANTES AND SAID TO THE WEIGHTTRESS, “table for two and a baby please.” “congregated cheese, younged lovers” the waiters said.  
They gave Jesus a highchair and began to order as it began to cry. “Dean, change your daughter,” Castiel said studying the menu. “Hell no, you took up the mother duties, you can breast feed it,” Dean said winking at the waitress who just took their order. “You are a horrible parent and husband,” Castiel said taking the baby and diaper bag and walking out with a few whistles and cheers as Dean sat there looking confused as ever.  
Castiel sat in his room with the baby tucked in, Gabriel walked in. “Castiel, have no fear, for I come with great hella news,” he said winking at Castiel. “What do you want, diabetes freak chucklehead buttnugget I am a single parent ,” Castiel said glaring at him from his current position of reading on the floor. “I want a lot of things, Cas, but I think your husband wants you more than he wants me,” the trickster as his whiskey eyeeseseses sparkeled. Deanie weenies said “hello castiel, I a m sorry for leaving you and our baby.”  
After an hour of talking about the feelings and kissing and butt touvhes changing the baby jesus amen bless satan what Castiel walked Dean to the door. “Good night, Dean,” Castiel said with the baby in his arms. “Good night, darling,” Dean said winking at Castiel. “You’re just gonna leave me here with a baby???????” Castiel screamed nopt sure what to do with the now screaming baby as Dean was walking toward his car. “You’ll be fine, babe,” Dean shouted blowing Castiel a kiss “No I WILL NOT BE OK” CASTIE L SAID AS BABY CRI AND HE CRY 2 AND DEDAN WALK OVER TO BOTH AN D SAY “asstieleic, Ily bby, not take care of jesus and then get back on ur pill.”  
The next day Dean picked Castiel up and they walked into school and were greeted by a “CONGRADULATIONS ON THE FRICK FRACK DEAN AND CASTIEL” sign in front of the school. Then they looked at eachother in the eyes and Castiel whispered in Dean’s ear, “if u come home 2night, I’ll make u hte spaghetti.” And dean looked in cstiels eyes and sai d “ur not my mom shes dead”


End file.
